Lost in Thought
by isadora quagmire
Summary: While under house arrest, Bernard learns a lesson in life, love, and loss from his cellmate. a santa clause 2 fic. Chapter 3 is up
1. prologue:solitude

~Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did, I'd be rich. I'd also have less spare time to write~  
  
Prologue: Solitude  
  
Being alone was, surprisingly, one of the things Bernard couldn't stand. Of course, he'd always pretended to dislike everyone else. Honestly, he didn't mind Judy or Abby, the cocoa elves, too much, and Curtis was ok, once you got to know him. So, basically, Bernard pretended for most of his life. He pretended not to get along with the other elves. He pretended he liked working with so many different Santas.  
  
It is, he'd admit, exciting meeting new Santas for the first time, but they're always clueless. Take Scott for example. Putting up with Scott in the beginning was incredibly difficult. Everything was, "why, why, why?" He just couldn't believe. Yet he had a positive effect on Bernard. Scott and Charlie had opened Bernard's eyes to the world around him. In fact, he was a more cheerful elf because of them. There were more sparkles on his cheeks now because of them.  
  
Bernard was always in control of his emotions. He never showed what he truly felt, except on very rare occasions. For example, Bernard loved kids. Not that he would ever tell anyone, but he was great with them. He knew how to act around them, what to say to them, and what they liked. Surprisingly enough, they liked him back.  
  
Bernard wasn't known for his big heart, but he did care about others. He regarded Judy, Abby, Curtis, and the other elves as siblings, not that he would ever tell them that.  
  
A/N: sorry it's short, but it is a prologue/teaser thing. I'd like to know how you like it so far, so, PLEASE review. 


	2. 4 Days 'till Christmas:The Visitors

~Disclaimer: I own nothing. If I did, I'd be rich. I'd also have less spare time to write~  
  
A/N: by popular demand, chapter 1!!!!  
  
Chapter 1:  
  
4 Days 'till Christmas: The Visitors  
  
Bernard had memorized the walls that enclosed him. He knew each bump, scratch, and rivet by heart, and after many failed attempts at escape, he knew how high each window was.  
  
Bernard had long since abandoned trying to use magic to escape. In fact, he had been extremely upset when he found out he couldn't use magic under house arrest, which resulted in the memorization of his surroundings. He was completely content doing this until his thoughts were disrupted by a familiar voice. He looked out the translucent door and saw the frame of his rule-abiding comrade.  
  
"Curtis," he whispered.  
  
"I need to see the Head Elf," Curtis announced. The guards must have refused, because Curtis tried a different approach. "Toy Santa - I mean Santa asked me to speak to the Head Elf about rules." They must have believed him, because their shadows moved away from the doors as Curtis fumbled with the handle.  
  
"Curtis," Bernard said.  
  
Curtis hushed him. "Bernard," he whispered, "there's not much time left. I need to find Santa and help him save Christmas!"  
  
"Curtis," Bernard whispered to his first connection with the outside world.  
  
"I know, I know," Curtis whispered back, "I messed up. I'm sorry Bernard. Forgive me?"  
  
"Curtis," Bernard whispered.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Thanks for stopping by. I was getting lonely."  
  
"What? Why are you thanking me? Don't you remember, it's my fault you're here?"  
  
"That doesn't matter. How are the other elves?" Bernard asked, letting his sensitive side show for once.  
  
"Toy Santa is really strict. He's made the whole pole unhappy! Some elves are starting to lose the sparkles on their cheeks!"  
  
"What? How could he? You have to get Scott, pronto!"  
  
"Will do. Goodbye, Bernard." With that, Curtis left the room and stormed down the hall. The regular toy solder guards took their posts again.  
  
"Goodbye," Bernard whispered, reluctant to let his 'brother' go.  
  
Hours later, when Bernard thought he was left with only his thoughts to keep him company, the door handle turned. Bernard's curly head snapped up.  
  
"They told me I could bring you cocoa this once, since it is really cold in here," Abby said. "Judy wishes she could help, but they wouldn't let her in for some reason, so she let me borrow her wonderful cocoa recipe to cheer you up."  
  
"Abby," Bernard whispered, getting up to hug his 'sister', making it the second time in one day he'd shown affection. She handed him a steaming cup of cocoa, which cheered him up visibly.  
  
Abby smiled. "I didn't know cocoa could make the big, unhappy Head Elf smile," she said.  
  
Bernard laughed a genuine laugh and put his mug down. "It's great to have company, even if it's only for a couple minutes," he said. "You know, Curtis stopped by earlier."  
  
"He told me he was going to," she responded, "He already left for Scott's house."  
  
"Good," Bernard whispered.  
  
One of the guards knocked on the door. "I'd better get going," Abby said.  
  
"It was great to see you," he whispered.  
  
"Goodbye," she said, hugging her 'brother' again.  
  
"Goodbye," he responded in a barely audible whisper.  
  
A/N: Reviews rock!!!! Special thanks to Tragedy Ann, Sanely Challenged, Phobic, and SilverclawRose for reviewing first!!!! And no, sorry Sanely, it's not slash. Thanks to everyone again! 


	3. 3 Days 'till Christmas:Marie

Disclaimer: It's not mine. Except for 3 characters.  
  
Chapter 2:  
  
3 days 'till Christmas  
  
Bernard glared at the doors of his prison. Their cheerful colors mocked him. They held many memories, good and bad. He drifted off into an uneasy sleep, thinking of the doors.  
  
Hours later, he bolted awake, sweating and panting. He pulled of his beret, ran a hand through his curls, and sighed. "It was just a dream," he whispered, "only a dream."  
  
"What's only a dream?" a female voice behind him asked.  
  
Bernard screamed, stumbling back. "Marie?" he asked.  
  
"And Lucas," she said, unfolding a bundle in her lap.  
  
"I don't remember you having a brother."  
  
"He's my son," she said proudly.  
  
"Your son? But you're only my age!"  
  
"He looks so much like Joey," she sighed, Ignoring Bernard.  
  
"Joey? You trusted Joey like that?" he asked, exasperated.  
  
Marie blushed, pulling a strand of amber hair out of her face. "So I've made some mistakes," she answered.  
  
"You have a son!" he cried.  
  
She glared at him with her dark green eyes. "And?"  
  
Bernard took a deep breath. "Look, I'm sorry. I didn't know it was such a touchy subject. I didn't mean to offend you or Lucas. All I want to know is where Joey is now."  
  
"You know those south pole elves," she said, a distant look in her eyes, "they can't stay in one place if their very existence depended on it."  
  
Bernard laughed darkly. "You know, my parents were South Pole elves," he said.  
  
Marie started. "South Pole elves?" she stuttered, "but that would make you one, too! No wonder you're so tall! Well, I never thought-"  
  
"Drop it," he said, glaring.  
  
"Sorry, I didn't know it was such a touchy subject."  
  
Bernard turned the other way. 'Of all the elves to get stuck with,' he thought, 'I get stuck with Marie.' He heard her walk over to the couch, cradling Lucas. Bernard turned around to see Lucas yawn.  
  
"You're tired, aren't you?" she cooed. She hummed softly, and then started to sing. "Calm down, my moonbeam, sleep well tonight. I'll be wishing my love to you."  
  
Bernard squeezed his eyes shut. He remembered when his mother sung that song to him. He whispered the second verse quietly, then, unable to control himself, joined Marie in the third. "Hang tight, my child, and close your eyes, hang tight, my child, you'll reach the skies. I'll be wishing my love to you."  
  
"Oh," Marie gasped, "I didn't know you knew that song."  
  
"It's a traditional South Pole lullaby," he whispered, "My mother used to sing it to me." He looked at the doors, cursing himself. His cabin fever had caused him to tell something personal. No other elf knew he was of South Pole decent. "It is a rather silly song, isn't it?" he said, breaking the silence.  
  
"Shh," she whispered, pointing to the sleeping bundle in her arms, "And yes, I agree." She smiled at him reassuringly.  
  
A/N: thanks Sanely Challenged, Ashley, and Anonymous for reviewing! 


	4. 3 Days 'till Christmas:memories pt 1

Disclaimer: Well, it's still not mine. Only my characters are, which is pretty obvious.

A/N: GOODNESS! I'm so sorry I haven't updated in a year! Don't fret, I'm back for good. I'll finish this and _Josh's Wonderful Life_, then get to _Loose Ends_. But remember, I'm back for good. ; p

Chapter 3:

3 day's 'till Christmas (continued)

Bernard closed his eyes and sighed. Marie and Lucas were now asleep, which strangely reassured him.

Opening his eyes, he glanced in their direction. The image that met his eyes made him smile. Marie's frail frame was curled up on the floor, Lucas clutched to her chest. The image that caught his attention most was Lucas' tiny hand wrapped around Marie's finger. He smiled bitterly, thinking of how he must have done the same with his mother.

Closing his eyes, he thought back to the day he first met Marie.

_Bernard woke up sweating and crying. He rubbed tears out of his eyes as he got out of bed. Starting his descent down the stairs, he called, "Mommy! Daddy! I need a hug!"_

_He walked into the kitchen, expecting his mother to be there. "Mommy," he asked, "Daddy?" A slip of paper on the table caught his eye. He walked over and read it:_

_**Dearest Bernard,**_

_**We are sorry you had to find out this way, but we can no longer survive in the North Pole. We understand you like life here, so we have departed without you. If you ever get the chance, visit us in the South Pole.**_

_**Mother and Father**_

_Bernard cried angry tears as he threw down his hat. "This is all you left me," he screamed, "You didn't even say you loved me! How could you!" He doubled over, breathing shallowly. Through his bitter tears, he whispered, "How could you." _

_After collecting himself, he ran a hand through his curls and picked his hat up. Before setting it back on his head, he cradled it in his arms. The red beret had been with him through many things. Most importantly, his mother had made it for him, or at least that is what she led him to believe, and it still held a significance he did not understand._

_A bitter thought filled his mind. 'They're worthless,' he thought. 'They were South Pole elves. South Pole elves don't understand compassion. They don't know how to love anyone but themselves.' Bernard's eyes widened with shock. If his parents were South Pole elves, so was he! Was he incapable of love?_

_Still distraught, he left his house, slamming the door behind him. He wasn't sure of where he was going, he just needed to be out. Bernard stormed off into the blizzard, his head held down. _

_"Hey, Bernard," someone called. Bernard's head snapped up. Standing across the street was Marie. _

_Bernard had heard about Marie from his parents and his classmates. His parents had told him to stay away from her. Apparently, she was trouble. Bernard snorted. Their opinion didn't matter to him anymore. His classmates warned him that she was weird. Their opinion had more of an effect. They told him that her family was 'dysfunctional' and 'different,' something no one wanted to be. Bernard laughed at the irony. Their opinion would mean nothing to him soon, for he found himself in the same situation. Going against society, Bernard greeted her._

_"Gee, no one's ever said hello back before," she responded, her amber curls falling in her face. Bernard found himself wishing she was this excited all the time. The enthusiasm that filled her was wonderful on her features. Her wide smile reached her glowing green eyes, and her skin filled with a pink hue. Bernard mentally shook his head. He couldn't be thinking these things now, especially not about Marie. He watched her begin to cross the street. Bernard smiled._

_"Marie, what are you doing out now," he asked._

_"I'm mearly – oops!"_

_"Marie," he cried, rushing to the middle of the street. He looked down at the girl in front of him. She lay in the road, her ankle twisted and beginning to swell. "Jeez, Marie," he said softly, "how'd you do that?"_

_"I don't know," she chuckled. Bernard reached down to help her up. She smiled as she leaned on him and brushed herself off. He smiled back shyly._

_Headlights and the sound of tires skidding bought them back to reality. "Uh-oh," he whispered as a large truck drove erratically towards them. _

_Biting his lip, Bernard made his decision. "Marie," he whispered, "you're gonna have to trust me." Marie nodded, and he pushed her into a nearby snow bank. Bernard smiled. "Success," he whispered. As he turned his head, he decided he spoke too soon. The truck was headed right towards him._


End file.
